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One man draws the shortest straw and goes to his friend's house to tell the wife. The man says to her, "Your husband lost some money in the poker game and is afraid to come home.". The wife.
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An Irishman and his son walk into a zoo. One of the signs says, "Feed the elephant a bun to get your age.". The little boy gives the elephant a bun and it stomps its foot 6 times. "Wow," says the boy, "That's right I am 6, you have a go dad!". The Irish chap gives the elephant a bun. A moment later the elephant farts and stomps twice.
20 Funny Irish Jokes That You Should Know! Ireland Travel Guides
5. View more comments. #2. Three guys - one Irish, one English, and one Scottish - are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish, that's three wishes in total," says the genie.
After having a few pints too many, Paddy heads home Jokes Of The Day
The Irish sense of humor and wit is renowned around the world and here's our pick of the best, or maybe worst depending on how you look at it, of Irish jokes. St. Patrick's Day engagement 7
This Hilarious St. Patrick's Day Irish Joke Is PURE GOLD
Best Irish jokes #1 The Irish pub: Sitting in a bar the Scotsman says, "As good as this bar is, I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow, there's a wee place. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he'll buy the fifth drink.". "Well," said the Englishman, "At my local in London, the barman.
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The Irish are known as great storytellers, and these are some of the best Irish jokes. Some of the greatest writers, such as James Joyce, are Irish.. "Oh yes it most certainly is", said the Irishman with a much broader Irish accent, "Dirty tree and a turd + dirty tree and turd + dirty tree and a turd, make a 100.
Top 10 Punch Lines to Irish Jokes St Patricks Day Jokes Pinterest
10) Irish jokes the Irishman and the travel agency. A man is walking down the street in Dublin when he sees a sign in the window of a travel agency that says cruises on Liffey River - $100. He goes into the agency and hands the guy $100. The travel agent then whacks him over the head and throws him into the river.
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Best Irish Joke #7. A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says, "I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers. I'll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back-to-back.". The room is quiet, and no one takes up the Texan's offer.
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He walks into the church and goes straight to the confessional box. There is silence. The priest waits for Finnegan to start talking. He waits and waits. Finally, the priest pounds on the wall of the confessional box. "Ain't no use in knocking," Finnegan yells back. "There is no paper on this side, either!".
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Irish jokes are some of the funniest in the world and they are definitely not for the faint of heart. If you are looking for a good laugh, then these jokes are definitely for you.. We hope you enjoyed our dirty Irish jokes! If you're looking for more clean, family-friendly St. Patrick's Day fun, check out our other articles. From crafts.
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Use this list of dirty Irish pick up lines at your own risk! If you're Irish and you love bad pick up lines, then you'll love this article. Use this list of dirty Irish pick up lines at your own risk!. Sex Tag: Irish, Jokes, Pick Up Lines, st. patrick's day. Previous Post: Why Chuck E. Cheese Is Still Using Floppy Disks To Make Its Rodent.
Two Irishmen are lost at sea then this happens Irish men, Funny
Skinny Irishman is a classic Irish joke: A skinny little Irishman goes into a lift, looks up and sees this HUGE black man standing next to him. The big man sees the little Irishman staring at him; he looks down and says: '7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 20-inch penis, 3 pounds of testicles, Turner Brown.'.
This Hilarious St. Patrick's Day Irish Joke Is PURE GOLD
1. The Irish farmer and the Smart-Ass Barrister. A smart-ass English barrister and an Irish farmer are sitting next to each other on a very long flight. Paddy is trying to sleep. The Barrister thinks to himself "Irishmen are so stupid; I could put one over on this big man easily…".
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READ ALSO: Top 10 hilarious jokes and lines to use in an Irish wedding speech, ranked. 5. An answered prayer. This funny Irish joke will definitely get the whole pub in fits of giggles - you can thank us later! An Irishman is struggling to find a parking space. "Lord," he prays, "I can't stand this.
50 Dirty Irish Jokes And Puns For Drunk Adults In Pub
Dirty Irish Jokes Wedding Night. Paddy takes his new wife to bed on their wedding night. She undresses, lies on the bed spread-eagled and says: "You know what I want, don't you?" "Yeah," says Paddy. "The whole feckin' bed by the looks of it!" Swingers. Two Irish couples decide to swap partners for the night.
Irish Joke A Texan walks into a bar in Ireland Irish jokes, Irish
The Irish have a unique sense of humour, and they love a good dirty joke. Here are ten hilarious Irish dirty jokes. Meanwhile in Ireland's top tips for telling hilarious Irish dirty jokes . 10. Feeling himself - you'd be arrested for less; 9. The sheep - shearing is caring; 8. Wedding night - you know what I want; 7.